“Now, are you still with your boyfriend?” a woman asked me yesterday.
“No, we broke up, like..a year ago,” I replied. “Yeah. It’s been quite a ride since then.”
Understatement of the Year.
TOP TEN RECAP.
In eleven months and five days, I :
1) Broke up.
2) Became pretty much a hot mess for a month.
3) Contemplated running away.
4) [...]
There’s Your Karma.
[dot com.]
Tag Archives: depression
488,160 minutes
F*ck you, Northside.
So I went to Michigan for a few days, and when I came back I didn’t have cable or internet, because both of those things were in Damon’s name, and he cancelled that shit. So I made a reservation for a technician to come between 12p and 2p today to re-install it, except that no [...]
If you hold your ear up to the monitor, you can actually hear my moods swinging
STATUS! I’m still trucking along. Stomach? No longer in knots. Eye? No longer twitching.
Overall feeling is still one of crappiness, a general malaise, if you will, but THAT’S OKAY. I know it’s going to suck for a little while. I’ll get back to being the witty chick with tons of pluck; I always do. I [...]
Chin Up.
I’m pretty sure Damon moved out while I was out of town this weekend. At least he moved enough stuff to live on. And by that I mean his computer is no longer in the bedroom. That’s as good as moved out, in his book.
So yeah. This is hard. This is much harder than I [...]
No Subject, Not at All.
And thus, here I am, back from my blogging sabbatical. (although “sabbatical” implies that my work here is “important” or “paid for,” which! it is clearly not.)
I think what happened is this:
What happened is this:
I kind of…freaked out, quietly, over the holidays.
I went home to Grand Rapids for a few days at Christmas. It was [...]
Hello, Self-Loathing? Speaking.
So…that was anti-climatic, huh?
Not getting the job offer at Starcom took me right back to not getting into Northwestern when I was seventeen. (Maybe the state of Illinois has it out for me, I don’t know.) There’s so much hype and anticipation, and the waiting only makes you want it more, makes you think you deserve it [...]
434
I promised to write every day of December and I already failed on December 2nd.
Nice job, N00B.
A pitcher of margaritas has a way of inciting free-flowing thought, so here’s some random things…
I keep having dreams about this possible impending job offer (which is no surprise, as it is all I can think about). Last night, [...]
Basically Just Senseless Bitching
I would have called in sick today, had I not been the only available person to close. [By myself. On a truck night. With 342342 other things to do in the department.] I’ve been getting struck with pangs of anxiety right before I leave for work, without warning or reason. I just can’t seem to [...]
363
So.
The crying spells, irritability, mood swings? Out of control. They are out of my control.
I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and I finally admitted to myself, yesterday, that I don’t know how to fix this.
I don’t know how to make myself better.
Another realization? No one, no matter how much they love me or [...]
356
Is it sad that everyone is talking about the new Superman, but really, I want to see The Devil Wears Prada, because I am shamelessly drawn to anything with Anne Hathaway in it? (, I know you are with me on this)…
…Hump Day (my day off) cannot come fast enough. I have not been able [...]
338
I’m listening to Paul Simon and it makes me miss my Dad.
I am also missing Rockford’s Start of Summer Festival.
A trip home is definitely needed. Hopefully sometime later this month.
I just need to fucking regroup.
I need to get it together.
337
So.
I’m going to be brutally honest — I haven’t been updating here because my current Life Story is so unbearably pitiful I can barely stand to live it, let alone write about it.
Also, if you use the internets but you don’t have the money to pay for it? They turn it off.
I am a mess.
And here’s why:
– [...]
‘Cause everything is Rent….
One of my biggest pet peeves is when people openly discuss money — particularly the actual dollar amount , how much they earn.
I don’t like talking about money because it’s rude. Because I make less than everyone in the world. (That’s right.! Everyone!) Because it reminds me of the mistakes I make with the little [...]
Hello, Extreme Irritability? Speaking.
My hormones are a fucking minefield, apparently.
And that minefield is the reason I should never, ever be allowed to be President. Because at ten o’clock this morning, I would have bombed the fuck out of somewhere. But first I would have fucked all the attractive semi-attractive decent-enough men and consumed their supply of chocolate. Then I would [...]
235
You know those HOW TO YOU FEEL TODAY posters?
The ones that look kinda like this?
Well, if you gave me a big fat Sharpie, mine would look like this:
..and then I’d probably huff the Sharpie.
