In the Spring of Ought-Four, I had a brief love affair with a friend of my college roommate.

And by brief love affair, I mean a fling.

And by fling, I mean I was totally his rebound.

I knew he had a girlfriend (she was studying abroad in Australia at the time) but the sparks between us were pretty palpable. She cheated on him with some Aussie, and on the day they broke up, he showed up at my door, looking all forlorn. HOWEVER, I was getting ready for a date. Ha! I had a date for a frat party. With a Hawaiian theme. “Kamanawannalaya.” (College!)  However, if there’s a blueprint for seducing any dude, it’s allowing him to watch you get ready to go on a date with another dude. Sure enough, a week later, we were making out under the cheap Christmas lights adorning my bedroom in the Varsity Villas. (College.)

The guy was from Chicago, and he was completely obsessed with a little-known rapper named “Kanye West.” “Have you heard of him?” he said, on one of the rare instances we’d come up for air. We were taking a break from “studying for exams,” and had popped The College Dropout into my stereo. It was 4am, and we were on our way to the Waffle House. (College!) “Toooooootally, I looooove him,” I surely cooed in response. A complete and utter lie, as I loved Jason Mraz and Maroon 5. (AT THE TIME.) A few weeks later, Spring Semester was over, and he handed me a cd of Kanye West stuff before we parted ways for the summer.

That thing never came out of my cd player. And it was the only token of that relationship that lasted: He got back with his ex, and I was upset for, oh, about five minutes.

Since then, I’ve pretty much just soaked up everything Kanye West has put down, despite my indie hipstery tendencies. And the cockier he gets? The more I love him. To me, Kanye West has more or less turned into a caricature of himself, and I can’t help but applaud that, because I think it’s entertaining as all hell. So you can imagine my excitement when Yeezy joined Twitter this week. His tweets are either a blatant showcase of his egomania? Or a total fun-poke at his egomania? ONLY KANYE KNOWS. IT’S JUST GOLDEN. He’s been the highlight of my Twitter stream all week. Was there anything better than waking up this morning to find out that Kanye West drunk-tweets?

In other news, UM - NABLOPOMO? PWNED.

31 days. 31 posts.

I DID IT.
AND IT FEELS LIKE THIS: