Do you live on the northeast side and find that your internet has been dragging as of late? Hi. It’s me. I’m in yer internetz, stealin’ your bandwith. (I accidentally misspelled that as “bandwitch” and nearly kept it. I totally justified it, thinking, yeah, I guess that would make me a bandwitch, cursing your network…. Stupid.)
I’m kind of embarrassed by how much anxiety I get when I can’t log on from home. I freak out! Despite the fact that I have internet access during my entire work day! A part of me wants to be comfortable with unplugging and oh, I don’t know, READING. The other part of me, the part that would kick that hippie’s ass, is highly concerned with the tweets of Smokey Robinson.
I’m also still without cable. Obviously I should be netflixing, instead of my current tactic of, “I’m bored, I’m going to spend $20 on Mamma Mia, despite never having seen it.” Can I just tell you the ATROCITY that is this movie? Holy balls, people. I’d say it ranks up into the Top Ten Worst Movies I’ve Ever Seen. And I have an extremely high tolerance for musicals. I’m really good at turning off that part of the brain that says, “WTF, why did everyone just turn into dancers all of a sudden?” and find pure joy in the fact that it’s absurd and wholesome and great. But this, MERYL? THIS? And I thought it impossible to make Pierce Brosnan less sexy, but I guess the trick is to make him sing. Awkward. Even Mr. Darcy seemed out of place. Musical-movie FAIL. I so was insulted by this movie that I’ve thought about returning it. That would involve taking it back to Best Buy claiming that it’s faulty, exchanging it for a new unopened copy, and hawking that sucker at Walmart in exchange for cash. That’s what this movie does to me. It makes me do awful, deceitful things.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have about 100MBs of photos to upload to flickr. Hope you didn’t have any plans with the interwebs, neighbors.
