I don’t like sports.
I don’t like Gatorade.
But I like this commerical:
Namely, Mia Hamm in the “soccer mom” mini van.
I can even handle the Payton Manning cameo, even though he is in 85% of all commericials aired in Indiana.
There’s Your Karma.
[dot com.]
Monthly Archives: March 2007
Mar 28
Heehee. He’s like a milkman.
Mar 28
I Refuse to Talk about Sanjaya.
Re: Last night’s American Idol…“Music Gwen Stefani Likes” does not a theme make!
…Still bitter about Gwen Stefani after that bitch stole Gavin Rossdale right out from under me… when I was thirteen.
I brought my very first diary back from Grand Rapids, and the last third is about my Bush/Gavin obsession:
November 12, 1996: “7 days until [...]
Mar 22
Warsh.
To fulfill a “topics course” for the college of arts and sciences, I opted to take a dialects class. The course description failed to inform me, however, that the class was actually entitled, Indiana Dialects. Oops. It was still interesting, although it kind of scarred me in two ways: 1) In a classroom full of [...]
Mar 19
Would You Hit It?
Every couple has a celebrity cheat code, in which a random chance meeting with a qualified celebrity may end in coitus. (I have been waiting to use “coitus” in a blog!) Mine, for example, is Dane Cook. If the universe somehow brings Dane Cook and I together and he decides to engage in the unholiest [...]
Mar 19
Couch Potato Season
American Idol is ridiculous this season. I definitely don’t have a standout favorite, like the OMG McPheever of ‘06. I kind of dig “beatboxer guy” and “rocker chick,” but can anyone explain to me how SANJAYA squeaks through every week?! Who keeps voting for him?! Ey yey yey!!! (Oh Snap. Apparently, Howard Stern and fans are [...]
Mar 18
Everyday is Spring Break in B-town.
People laugh at me when I tell them that I sometimes “feel old” living here. They don’t believe me when I say that when you are twenty-three in Bloomington, Indiana, you are pretty much middle-aged.
Here, the proof: According to cnnmoney.com, Bloomington is the FIFTEENTH YOUNGEST CITY in the United States!
Also, NUMBER ONE for percentage of [...]
Mar 18
Smegma and Friend
There needs to be some kind of check and balance for when I am so emotional.
Like, when my estrogen level reaches a certain point, petfinder.com should be blocked from my internet browser.
["I want to adopt all of them!" *squeal* *cry* *stuff girl scout cookie in mouth*]
I kind of want a cat like this:
They look so [...]
Mar 15
Michigan’s Adventures
I was in Grand Rapids, albeit briefly, this weekend. My mom and aunts were planning a bridal shower for my cousin, Allory, the first of us cousins to get married. For the past three months, every call home made me privy to every. single. detail. of bridal-shower-planning splendor. My mom spent so much time and energy on it, but part of me suspects [...]
Mar 15
Spring Break 2K7: Will Flash Boobs for Food
The Best Buy debacle ironed itself out quite nicely with a nice talking-to from my general manager. [wha happon]? It was a big communication problem, apparently, so my freak out was somewhat appropriate with the information I had, but now that I know the story, I feel like a total drama queen. Which I am. [...]
Mar 07
I am so bad at this.
So. I have a bunch of guy friends who recently knocked up some ho’s, whereas “ho’s” can be defined by their very loving and beautiful girlfriends or wives. They are all due sometime this month, and I found out via Facebook (bless it) that Allisha was the first one to pop.
Here is what I posted on [...]
Mar 07
Recent Happy Haps
It’s not that I’m not listening to what you’re actually saying.
It’s just that,
if whatever phrasing you use is remotely similar to song lyrics I know
[and I know quite a few],
there is this little mechanism in my brain that momentarily taps into that memory.
Perhaps this is why I would get much more out of life if it were [...]
Mar 05
This Entry WILL NOT Be Posted on Blue Shirt Nation.
Some time ago, BBY Corporate sent out an e-mail about blueshirtnation.com — a networking tool for Best Buy employees, like MySpace, or Facebook. “Like I really need another one of those,” I said. “Delete.” …Of course I signed up for it…especially upon learning that the mod for the site is in advertising up at corporate. [...]
Mar 04
<STRONG>IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?<BR></STRONG>
[Stolen from Cody]
So, here’s how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc).
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question, type the song that’s playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button.
6. Don’t lie!
HOKAY, so the first time I did this, my randomly chosen “Opening Credits” [...]
Mar 04
you came along to turn on everyone
Remember that one time, when they made a major motion picture about my PAST LIFE?!?!?!
I have conflicting feelings about this film.
Hits:
+ Moulin Rouge was uber-successful, as was Rent, even though that movie was barely watchable and didn’t do an ounce of justice to the broadway show.
+ Um, hello. Bono plays “Dr. Roberts” and Eddie Izzard plays “Mr. [...]