I SNORKELED HERE.

This was my first time snorkeling.  [I wish I had a picture of me with my little flippers and mask on, because it must have been a hoot.]
Anyway, this is Hanauma Bay.

It’s actually the crater of an ancient volcano!
I know this because I finally sobered up by the time we got to watching the safety video.

This was taken before we got on the bus to the bay.  I was feeling uptight and grumpy. And being uptight and grumpy does not paradise make.  So I downed half a bottle of Kendall-Jackson not long after breakfast. [I know that screams alcoholic and I willingly take that risk, dammit.]  I also shared gulped a Sparks or two with Damon, which  is surely entertaining  right now, because I know she loves those. Despite my sudden positive mood swing and extreme chattiness with people in our transporation van, Damon was completely oblivious.  Hilarious.

[Yup. Still look a little drunk.  In fact, I am probably holding on to him for dear life, so as not to topple over that railing.]

Snorkeling was amazing, and probably one of the highlights of my trip.  I was inches from the most beautiful fish I’ve ever seen.
Like the humuhumunukunukuapua’a fish.  [I'm not even kidding.]

Then there’s huge fish like these parrotfish, and I kind of freaked out for a second.
[What, like it was going to attack me?  I'm such a fucking pussy.]
[But seriously, it looks small here, but it's really the size of a small horse.]

This kid caught Jenniferia Kriscunalis!